Brainiac beasts

Humans tend to think we’re pretty special. And, to be fair, we legitimately are, but the thing we tend to value most about ourselves, our intelligence, may not be quite as unique as we think it is.

Now, most people know that chimpanzees, and probably the other great apes, are probably pretty close to us in intelligence. Not surprising, after all they are our closest living relatives.

And I think a similar fraction of the population knows that at least some dolphins and other cetaceans are pretty bright, as well. But not as many people know about these other brainiacs of the animal kingdom.

Elephants

You know, the big grey critters with the nose-hands. Evidence increasingly suggests that elephants are about as smart as primates and cetaceans.

They mourn their dead (even burying them, to some degree), they have complex societies, their memory is literally proverbial, they use tools, they seem to have a complex language, basically they exhibit just about every sign of intelligence we can reasonably test for in a multi-ton herbivore we can’t directly communicate with.

They’ve even passed the mirror test–especially remarkable in an animal with rather poor vision that doesn’t routinely engage in grooming behavior.

Parrots

Not all parrots are thought to be highly intelligent, just like not all cetaceans or all primates are, but a number of larger species of parrot are probably on the “might be people” list.

I think most of us know that many parrots can “parrot” human speech, but evidence is increasingly suggesting that at least some of them are not just clever mimics, but are actually capable of learning human languages. There was even one remarkable case where the only surviving record we have of a human language came from a single pet parrot.

And, sure, parrots don’t speak human languages as well as humans can, but on the other hand, how well do we speak *their* languages?

Parrots also have complex social behaviors, including altruism, they have engaged in at least limited tool use, and they have performed on a simple cognition test (involving a treat under a cup) at least as well as a roughly 5-year-old human.

Corvids

Corvids are the group of birds that includes crows, ravens, and jays. And while, again, this is a rather large clade with a varying range of intelligence, some of the top performers are capable of some truly impressive feats of intelligence.

Let’s start with the New Caledonian Crow. These guys not only use tools in the wild (which, to be fair, a lot of species do), they manufacture tools. They can even plan ahead, doing things like using one tool to acquire another tool, remembering what tool they will need to retrieve a reward later, or saving a particularly good tool for later use.

But they definitely aren’t the only corvids that have demonstrated tool use, and tool use isn’t the only intelligent behavior corvids have displayed. Many corvids are passable mimics of human speech (though, to my knowledge, there’s no real evidence that they actually understand human language like certain parrots seem to), as well as a variety of other noises. They exhibit complex social behaviors. They remember faces, give gifts to people they like, and even teach each other about dangerous humans. There are even efforts to teach crows and other corvids to pick up trash, coins, or the like in exchange for food rewards.

So, next time you’re tempted to insult someone by calling them a “bird brain”… maybe don’t.